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As I went out, closing the door behind me, I was a little uneasy; I mean, it’s a strange man and we’re all alone—oh, man, are we alone!—and I didn’t feel real safe right now. I locked the door of my bedroom, and it took me a long while to fall asleep.But I did, and for the first time since I’ve been here I slept well. I realized as I drifted off that I hadn’t thought about that damn court case in, well, hours. Maybe I needed something like Hugo to take my mind off it.I had to show him the shower next morning, but he figured it out pretty quick. I took the bandage off him before, and tried to let him know I’d put it back on when he was done. He came out in the same pants, but without his vest.After I re-bandaged him I gave him a pair of my dad’s old slacks and a shirt. I didn’t have any skivvies, but I didn’t think he’d been wearing any, either; he’d have to go commando. He understood the buttons OK, but I had to show him the zipper.He started to change right there, but I stopped him. I have enough problems Of my own!!Give up smoking, drinking, and sexGod visited a woman and told her she must give up smoking, drinking, and sex if she wants to get into heaven.The woman said she would try her best.God visited the woman a week later to see how she was getting on.“Not bad” said the woman, “I’ve given up smoking and drinking, but when I bent over to get some stuff out of the freezer and my boyfriend caught sight of my long slender legs, he pulled up my skirt, pulled my panties to one side and made love to me right then and there.”“They don’t like that in heaven,” said God.The woman replied: “They’re not too happy about it in Costco either!”This one is compliments of J & BSome True-isms to ponder.Don’t die a Virgin ... Seriously, there are terrorists waiting for you up there.If you don’t swear while driving that means you’re not paying attention to go at all.If at first you don’t succeed, try doing it the way your wife told you.You’re never childless when you have a.
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